“Be watchful, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong. Let all that you do be done in love.”
1 Corinthians 16:13-14 ESV
The sovereign King of creation who branded men in His very image beckons them to reject passivity, accept responsibility, and to courageously initiate decisive action as a Christ-built warrior-poet for the sake of their wives and children who are entrusted to them as a stewardship from God (Gen 18:19; Deut 6:4-9; 1 Cor 16:13-14). Unfortunately, not all males care to “man up,” as it were, through the intentional ownership of manly responsibilities but would much rather be stranded in Neverland.
Harvard educated U.S. Senator Ben Sasse (R-NE) earned a Ph.D. in American history from Yale whose experience as president of Midland University precipitated a striking cultural analysis in The Vanishing American Adult: Our Coming-of-Age Crisis—and How to Rebuild a Culture of Self-Reliance which should especially cause men to take stock of their lives (Sasse, 2017, p. 2). Sasse (2017) explains that the J.M. Barrie classic story of Peter Pan is really not a cheery fairy tale because the main character is not at all a commendable hero (p. 13). Pan is selfish, shortsighted, and refuses to grow up being stranded in Neverland even blatantly confessing that “I don’t want to be a man” (Sasse, 2017, p. 13). The aspiration of perpetual adolescence is not an achievement of civilization but a national existential crisis which challenges men with the opportunity to intentionally lead their families through disciplined lives themselves rather than choosing to be stranded in Neverland (Sasse, 2017, p. 14).
A similar observation of this cultural crisis is offered by Patrick (2010) who laments the statistics of the video game and pornography industry (p. 10). Therein is where a new kind of male whom he labels as Ban, a hybrid of both boy and man, prolongs his adolescence, in an entire cultural niche created for him to indulge the recreational and sensual lusts of youth (Patrick, 2010, p. 9). This suspension between childhood and adulthood, is a cultural crisis of being perpetually stranded in Neverland as a result of a volitional choice to refuse the manly responsibilities which have characterized men down through the annals of history. Patrick (2010) notes that this crisis of manhood is a capital opportunity to “call them out” for their sin and “call them up” to be more than just biologically male (p. 13). The Almighty Creator King in whose image men have been branded does indeed beckon them to deliberately step up into the irreplaceable nature of manhood.
As a direct corollary to manhood, fatherhood is also irreplaceable because men not only have a unique leadership role in the marriage relationship but also bear distinct responsibility in the parenting process (Stinson, 2011, p. 82). Fathers are noted by Stinson (2011) as being primarily responsible for the overall spiritual direction of the household which, of course, includes the children (p. 82). Founder of the dynamic ministry, Family Life Today, Dennis Rainey recognizes that children are the innocent victims of the raging storm of this cultural crisis which renders many fathers as AWOL in far too many homes (Rainey, 2011, p. 28).
In the closing years of the twentieth century, David Blankenhorn’s research of this modern phenomena issued a clarion call in Fatherless America: Confronting Our Most Urgent Social Problem. As the founder of the Institute for American Values, he pronounced that the fatherless family is a social invention of the most daring and untested design which represents a radical departure from virtually all of human history and experience (Blankenhorn as cited in Rainey, 2011, p. 28). This research is also acknowledged as recognizing the devastating reality that many fathers today have physically abandoned their families whereas others remain physically present but emotionally distant (Blankenhorn as cited in Stinson, 2011, p. 82).
There are many men who have honestly confessed that they do not know how to do marriage and family well because they have inherited a bankrupt legacy which leaves them ill-equipped for such manly responsibility (Rainey, 2011, p. 30). Five prevailing biblical themes of manhood are enumerated by Rainey (2011) including 1. A man controls his emotions and passions (1 Tim 4:12, 6:11; 2 Tim 2:22), 2. A man provides for his family (1 Thes 2:11-12; 1 Tim 5:8), 3. A man protects his family (Neh 4:14; Pr 4:10-15), 4. A man serves and leads his family (1 Cor 13:4-7; Eph 5:25-33; Phil 2:3-5), and 5. A man follows God’s design for true masculinity (1 Kings 2:2 Mic 6:8; 1 Cor 16:13-14) (pp. 31-33). An awakening to the irreplaceable nature of courageous manhood along with fatherhood to the enormous gospel task of marriage and family will result in what Stinson (2011) affirms as the faith being more adequately transmitted down through the generations and the gospel being multiplied to every tribe, every tongue, & every nation to the praise of God’s glory in Christ Jesus (p. 88).
References
Patrick, D. (2010) Church planter: the man, the message, the mission. Wheaton, IL: Crossway Books.
Rainey, D. (2011) Stepping up: a call to courageous manhood. Little Rock, AR: Family Life Publishing.
Sasse, B. (2017) The vanishing American adult: our coming-of-age crisis and how to rebuild a
culture of self-reliance. New York, NY: St. Martin’s Press.
Stinson, R. & Jones, T. P., eds. (2016) Trained in the fear of God: family ministry in theological,
historical, and practical perspective. Grand Rapids, MI: Kregel Publications.
