“Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.” Proverbs 22:6 NKJV
What kind of man or woman do you desire your child to become? I am sure that you would hate to see your child become an irresponsible fool whom you are ashamed of, that dishonors your family, and also grieves the heart of God. On the other hand, seeing your child full of wisdom and integrity would certainly make you grateful and more importantly bring glory to God.
Parenting is not about our temporal comfort and pleasure but about bringing glory and honor to God by reflecting His character and helping the world find Him through the testimony of our children’s lives.
The Houston Police Department has Twelve Rules for Raising Delinquent Children
1. Begin with infancy by giving the child everything he wants; in this way, he will believe the world owes him a living.
2. When he picks up that vulgar word, laugh at him; this will make him think he’s cute.
3. Never give him spiritual training. Wait until he is twenty-one and then let him decide for himself.
4. Always avoid the use of the word ‘wrong.’ It may develop a guilt complex. This will condition him to believe later, when he’s arrested, that society is against him and he’s being persecuted.
5. Pick up everything he leaves around the house. Do everything for him so that he will be experienced in throwing all responsibility upon others.
6. Let him read any printed matter he gets his hands on. Be careful that the silverware and drinking glasses are sterilized, but let his mind feed on filth.
7. Quarrel frequently in the presence of your children; this way they won’t be shocked when the home is broken up later on.
8. Give the child all the spending money he wants. Never make him earn his own.
9. Satisfy his every craving for food, drink, and comfort. See that every sensual desire is gratified; hold back nothing.
10. Take his part against neighbors and officers of the law and teachers. They’re all prejudiced against your child.
11. When he gets into trouble, apologize for yourself by saying, ‘I never could do anything with that boy anyway.’
12. Prepare yourself for a life of grief; you will likely have it!
(From, “Encyclopedia of 7,700 Illustrations” by Paul Lee Tan)
As a parent, especially you dad as the leader, are the architect of your child’s heart. Therefore, it is imperative that you deposit truth, wisdom, and virtue into the heart of your child. Children have a God-given foundation to who they are called their temperament. The house that is constructed upon this is what we call their personality. The quality of the construction of this house is dependent upon the architect which in this case is the parents. Because of this, parents and especially fathers must never shirk our responsibility to train our children, be flippant, nor take it lightly. The person that our child becomes is dependent upon the heart training and instruction in wisdom or lack thereof that they receive during their early years.
Parenting is indeed a monumental endeavor. We can take heart though because the God of the Bible promises to empower us through Christ if we will but trust and depend upon Him. The Lord has given the answers in His Holy Word, the Bible, to everything we face in life including parenting our children.
You cannot give what you do not have and you cannot teach what you have never learned yourself.
Unless you receive additional instruction in this area of life, you will parent the same way that you observed growing up or go to the opposite extreme instead of a healthy balance. The ripple effect of the negative and ungodly trends in the life of your family will continue to infect your children and grandchildren and many generations to come unless someone allows the Lord to intervene in their life by responding to His truth through faith.
Our goal in the following is to give you a multi-generational vision for your family, a blue-print of where and how to begin, and also to equip you with some essential tools that will enable you to start the building process of raising Godly children for the glory of God.
I. Marriage: Priority Relationship in the Family
“For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh…So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate” Matthew 19:5,6 NKJV.
The foundation of good parenting is the marriage relationship. Dad, ensure that your family is on solid footing by giving your children one of the greatest gifts that you can ever give, the security in knowing and seeing that “my dad loves my mom.” Cold, empty, and lifeless marriages that are full of strife deeply inflict children with hurt as a low-level anxiety is released in their hearts that affects everything they are engaged in.
Husband, remember that you as the man must take charge and lead in love by intentionally fighting for your wife’s heart. Wife, whether or not you feel that he is loving you, out of submission and obedience to the Lord, respect your husband. If we do not pursue oneness in marriage, then we are drifting toward isolation. It is then only a matter of time that the marriage will be no more. For the sake of future generations, eliminate the “D-word” from your vocabulary as it is not an option!
Actions Points that Serve as a Vehicle in Keeping the Priority of the Marriage Relationship Before Your Children:
1. “Couch Time”-Sit together in front of your children on a daily basis and talk.
2. “Date Night”-Weekly, remove your wife from her role as mother and remind her that she is still your beloved whom you are pursuing. As a rule of thumb, date your wife one night a week, one day a month, and one weekend a year.
3. “T.L.C.”-Snuggle, hug, kiss, and say “I love you” in front of your children often.
II. Parental Authority-Parents are in Charge With Dad as the Leader
“Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord” Ephesians 6:1,4 NKJV
Children are not your peers, buddies, or gods whom you must appease through fearful obeisance or seek to win over their approval or affection. The goal is for them to eventually to be our close friends in a familial relationship but the time is not now. They are precious gifts received from the hand of God, welcomed additions to an already established family unit consisting of the husband/wife relationship, and divinely ordained to leave the home.
Guard against the destructive contaminants that lurk on the T.V., internet, in the movies, music, and even in and through the hearts of other children. Do not contribute to your children thinking that they are the governor of their life and foster something in them that Proverbs calls being “wise in your eyes.”
Actions Points that Serve as a Vehicle in Keeping Parental Authority Before Your Children:
1. Respect and Honor-Dad, do not tolerate disrespect, “whininess”, or complaining (i.e. bad attitudes) especially toward mom who is still your wife.
2. Shoot Straight-When giving instruction, “say what you mean and mean what you say” as opposed to asking them if they would like to go to bed, for example.
3. Age-Appropriate Choices-Young children are not responsible enough to make wise decisions about their diet, dress, and education let alone the family finances, housing, and vacation.
III. Heart-Training: Deposit Wisdom and Virtue into Your Child as the Chief Architect of their Heart
“Your word I have hidden in my heart, That I might not sin against You” Psalm 119:11 NKJV.
“You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up” Deuteronomy 6:7 NKJV.
It is easy to demand obedience from your child using the ploy, “do this or else.” Such an external conformity to morality lasts only as long as they are under your authority. Reach the heart by diligently placing virtue therein so that your child will in the long run obey out of the love of virtue rather than the fear of reproof. Children must learn why right is right and why wrong is wrong. The moral reason why that lies behind our actions values the preciousness of others by remembering those who surround and follow behind us. Heart-training is aimed at reaching the heart and establishing internal morality rather than external conformity to rules.
Actions Points that Serve as a Vehicle in Training Your Child’s Heart
1. “Moral Reason Why”-Teach them right & wrong from God’s Word & that our actions affect others.
2. “Moral Warehouse”-Place truth therein that they may draw from and act upon.
3. “Internal Morality”-Train them to obey out of love for God and virtue rather than the fear of reproof.
IV. First-Time Obedience: Require Immediate, Unquestioned, and Joyful Obedience From the Heart.
“Children, obey your parents in all things, for this is well pleasing to the Lord” Colossians 3:20 NKJV
Delayed obedience is disobedience. Compliant children who have a bad attitude really are not obeying from the heart. More desirable is the child whose heart you have reached who obeys most of the time and occasionally disobeys than the child who readily complies with everything you say and never defiantly rebels whose heart you have not reached.
When giving instruction, require your child to look you in the eye and respond with a “yes daddy/mommy/sir/maam.” This verbal response helps the instruction to register in the child’s mind, binds them to your instruction, renders them accountable to you, and responsible for carrying out your instruction. Remember to be consistent and hold your child to the standard of first-time obedience. The inevitable disobedience is a result of their choice to rebel against your instruction and authority and results in them having to take responsibility for the consequences of their actions.
Actions Points that Serve as a Vehicle in Training Your Child in First-Time Obedience
1. Eye Contact-Breaks their will and shows who is in charge.
2. Verbal Response-A “yes sir” is their agreement to do what you say.
3. Be Consistent-Disobedience must be dealt with a.s.a.p.
V. Biblical Chastisement-Something You Do FOR Your Child NOT To Them
“Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child; The rod of correction will drive it far from him” Proverbs 22:15 NKJV
The Bible teaches that if you really love your children then you will chastise or spank them with the rod of correction when they disobey you. When your child disobeys your instruction, they are responsible for the consequences of their actions. Our bodies are so designed by God that there is a direct connection between the rump and the heart and mind.
Biblical chastisement is to be done…
1. In private as a personal matter between parent and child.
2. With an explanation of the offense and why it is wrong according to God’s Word.
3. With self-control and NEVER in anger.
4. Immediately if at all possible.
5. Using a firm but flexible instrument other than the hand. Hands are for reaching out in love.
6. On the bottom (3 swats are sufficient).
7. With verbal reassurance of love.
8. Ending in prayer together.
VI. Family Identity-Intentionally Build Character, Memories, & a Network of Inter-Dependent Relationships
“Unless the LORD builds the house, They labor in vain who build it; Unless the LORD guards the city, The watchman stays awake in vain” Psalm 127:1 NKJV.
Too many children would rather be anywhere else than at home with their family. Our culture propagates a “meism” attitude that is destructive to families as it promotes a need for no one else but me, myself, and I and as much money as I can get in any way, shape, or form. We must be diligent to build a “weism” spirit in our homes that promotes a mutual need for one another as each of us have something to uniquely give and contribute to the identity of the family unit.
Being intentional here carries with it the goal of our children being able to look back on their childhood with joyful gratitude and thanksgiving to God for placing them in such a family. Men, as dads, you are the leaders in this and set the pace for the degree to which your family will be built and cultivated as a fortress of freedom for the glory of God!
Proactive Action Points that Build Family Identity…
1. Family Worship
-private: Sing, pray, and read the Bible or Bible story book together as a family.
-corporate: Go to church and worship the Lord together with other families.
2. Family Meals-Enjoy eating and sharing together as a family. Dad, be a man and lead in prayer and read the Bible or a devotional after the meal and dismiss in prayer.
3. Family Reading-Turn off the TV and good books together as a family.
4. Family Walks-Get outside and enjoy God’s creation by hitting the sidewalk, a trail, or a local park.
5. Family Vacations-Get out of town and do something fun and memorable on a road trip like camping, a national park, or the beach and not just a “stay-cation.”
Remember, as parents, we shape the hearts and therefore lives of our children. Who they become and what they go on to accomplish is largely dependent upon who you are and what you invest into their lives.
“Two families from the state of New York were studied very carefully. One was the Max Jukes family and the other was the Jonathan Edwards family. The thing that they discovered in this study is remarkable: like begets like.
Max Jukes was an unbelieving man and he married a woman of like character who lacked principle. And among the known descendants, over 1,200 were studied.
- 310 became professional vagrants
- 440 physically wrecked their lives by a debauched lifestyle
- 130 were sent to the pen for an average of 13yrs.each, 7 of whom for murder
- 100 became drunks
- 60 became habitual thieves
- 190 public prostitutes
- Of the 20 who learned a trade, 10 of them learned the trade in a state prison. It cost the state about $1,500,000 and they made no contribution whatever to society.
In about the same era the family of Jonathan Edwards came on the scene. And Jonathan Edwards, a man of God, married a woman of like character. And their family began and they became a part of this study that was made.
- 300 became clergymen, missionaries, and theological professors
- Over 100 became college profs
- Over 100 became attorneys, 30 of them judges
- 60 of them became physicians
- Over 60 became authors of good classics, good books
- 14 became presidents of universities
- There were numerous giants in American industry that emerged from this family.
- 3 became United States congressmen
- 1 became the vice president of the United States (From “A Spiritual Clinic” by J. Oswald Sanders)
What are you doing today to ensure that you are not spawning a long line of irresponsible fools but establishing a dynasty of valiant warriors and maidens of virtue for the glory of God? What will your legacy be and what will your children pass on to succeeding generations? Are you willing to do what it takes to raise not only great kids but Godly kids? After all, is God glorified through the lives of great kids if they are not also Godly kids? Are you all in?
“And whatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him.” Colossians 3:17 NKJV
*Derived from “Growing Kids God’s Way” by Gary & Anne Marie Ezzo and the “Biblical Principles for Family Life” class at Berean Bible Institute.
Recommended Resources:
Fatherhood
- “Courageous” the movie & “Show Me the Father” documentary by the Kendrick Brothers
- “The Resolution for Men” (see Appendix 2, “Six Powerful Influences You Must Guard in Your Children’s Lives”) by Stephen & Alex Kendrick
- “Raising a Modern-Day Knight: A Father’s Role in Guiding His Son to Authentic Manhood” by Robert Lewis
- “Dad the Family Shepherd” & “The Fourth Generation Rule” by Dave Simmons
Family Life
- “Family Driven Faith: Doing What It Takes to Raise Sons and Daughters to Walk With God” by Voddie Baucham
- “Point Man: How a Man Can Lead His Family” by Steve Farrar
- “The Most Important Place on Earth: What a Christian Home Looks Like and How to Build One” by Robert Wolgemuth
Manhood
- “Missing From Action: Vanishing Manhood in America” by Weldon Hardenbrook
- “Manhood: The Masculine Virtues America Needs” by Josh Hawley
- “Thinking in Public” interview (06/21/2023), “The War Against Manhood and the American Cultural Crisis”, at www.AlbertMohler.com.
- “Disciplines of a Godly Man” by R. Kent Hughes
- “God’s Gift to Women: Discovering the Lost Greatness of Masculinity” by Eric Ludy
- “Mansfield’s Book of Manly Men: An Utterly Invigorating Guide to Being Your Most Masculine Self” by Stephen Mansfield
- “The Dude’s Guide to Manhood: Finding True Manliness in a World of Counterfeits” by Darren Patrick
- “Stepping Up: A Call to Courageous Manhood” book & video series by Dennis Rainey
- “Tender Warrior: Every Man’s Purpose, Every Woman’s Dream, Every Child’s Hope” by Stu Weber
Marriage
- “The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate” by Gary Chapman
- “Love for a Lifetime: Building a Marriage That Will Go the Distance” by James Dobson
- “Love & Respect” by Emerson Eggerichs
- Weekend to Remember Marriage Conferences – Save 50% off registration with Coupon Code: TimLoriBoard. Check out FamilyLife.com for more information.
- “Rekindling the Romance: Loving the Love of Your Life” by Dennis & Barbara Rainey
- “Like the Shepherd: Leading Your Marriage with Love and Grace (A Husband’s Guide)” by Robert Wolgemuth
Parenting
- “Growing Kids God’s Way” by Gary & Anne Marie Ezzo
- “Will They Stand: Parenting Kids to Face the Giants” by Ken Ham
- “Heaven Help the Home Today: Successful Parenting in Challenging Times” by Howard & Jeanne Hendricks
- “So You’re About to Be a Teenager: Godly Advice for Teens on Friends, Love, Sex, Faith, & Other Life Issues” by Dennis & Barbara Rainey
- “The Vanishing American Adult: Our Coming-of-Age Crisis and How to Rebuild a Culture of Self Reliance” by Ben Sasse
- “Shepherding a Child’s Heart” by Tedd Tripp
Worldview & Culture
- “The Babylon Bee Guide to Wokeness: How to Take Your Wokeness to the Next Level by Canceling Friends, Breaking Windows, and Burning It All to the Ground” by The Babylon Bee
- “What Does It Mean to Be a Man?” w/Voddie Baucham & Ben Shapiro (6/2023) at www.youtube.com.
- “Live Not by Lies: A Manual for Christian Dissidents” by Rod Drehr
- “We Will Not Be Silenced: Responding Courageously to Our Culture’s Assault on Christianity” by Erwin Lutzer
- “The Gathering Storm: Secularism, Culture, and the Church” by Albert Mohler
- “The Briefing: Daily News & Analysis of Events Through a Christian Worldview” at AlbertMohler.com
- “The Truth Project” video series with Del Tackett
Theology
- “A Biblical Life: Following Paul As He Followed Christ” by W. Edward Bedore
- “Practical Dispensational Theology” at www.BereanBibleInstitute.org
- “AWE: Why It Matters for Everything We Think, Say, & Do” by Paul David Tripp
“Great is the Lord, and greatly to be praised; And His greatness is unsearchable. One generation shall praise Your works to another, and shall declare Your mighty acts.” Psalm 145:3-4 NKJV
*Take a journey with me as we travel together back in time to the ancient Roman Empire. Robert Wolgemuth, in The Most Important Place on Earth: What a Christian Home Looks Like and How to Build One, shares how he and his almost-eight-year-old granddaughter viewed a massive piece of art in a Charlotte, NC museum. It was Jean-Leon Gerome’s 1863 piece called Early Christian Martyrs in the Coliseum at Rome. Personally, I first came across this piece of art myself at Wisconsin’s Northern Grace Youth Camp, where I found a hundred-year-old copy of Foxe’s Book of Martyrs, which I later paid my oldest son something like $20 to read cover-to-cover at about 10 years old.
There was indeed a real-time in history when Christians whose supreme allegiance was to the Sovereign Potentate, the Lord Jesus Christ, and therefore refused to bow the knee and confess with their tongues that “Caesar is Lord” were condemned to the arena with wild beasts as entertainment for the Coliseum’s blood-thirsting masses. Reflecting upon this sobering reality, Wolgemuth’s challenge for us is to “imagine what it must have been like to sit down with your family and explain what being Christians in your neighborhood would mean. The answer takes different to a whole new level, doesn’t it? But the message has some similarities to your family and mine today. Culture-friendly can’t be on our family’s priority list. That builds nothing in our homes and takes us nowhere. Different should be on that list.”
Advancing the Cause of Christ Begins at Home
“Through wisdom a house is built, and by understanding it is established; By knowledge the rooms are filled with all precious and pleasant riches” (Pr.24:3-4 NKJV).
Advancing the cause of Christ to the ends of the earth through biblical family life is central to the Grace Commission because the spiritual health and vitality of the local church are built upon the spiritual health and vitality of the Christian home. The stewardship responsibility of this cause of Christ encompasses the comprehensive nature of the biblical worldview, in general, and the gospel of the grace of God, in particular. Where will the next generation of pastors, missionaries, and ministry leaders come from if churches and families lack the wisdom, vision, and courage that is needed to co-champion the next generation and advance the cause of Christ to the ends of the earth? It is not the responsibility of ministry training schools to raise them up because ministry training begins well ahead of time right at home with dad and mom as they live on mission in Christ and are anchored in the local church together with their children.
It does not take a rocket scientist to understand that demographics are grim and radical changes must be made by churches and families moving forward as co-champions of the next generation. The strength of our gospel outreach both here and abroad depends on the spiritual health and vitality of American Grace churches. Therefore, if you and I care about God’s glory being magnified through the salvation of rebel sinners among all nations worldwide, then we must care about our country, our churches, and especially our homes. Since advancing the cause of Christ to the ends of the earth begins right at home with biblical marriage and family life, we must take very seriously how students of history like Rod Drehr encourage “Christian parents [to] be intentionally countercultural in their approach to family dynamics.”1 We must do so with dead serious urgency through the irreplaceable nature of 1. Manhood, 2. Marriage, 3. Fatherhood, and 4.a Multiplied Legacy to the praise of God’s glory in Christ Jesus throughout eternity.
Advancing the Cause of Christ through…The Irreplaceable Nature of Manhood
“So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. Then God blessed them, and God said to them, ‘Be fruitful, and multiply; fill the earth and subdue it; have dominion…” (Gen. 1:27-28a NKJV).
When the Lord Jesus Christ Himself spoke galaxies into existence just about 6,000 years ago in six literal 24-hour days, He also branded mankind in His image with a stewardship responsibility described as the cultural mandate of dominion (Gen. 1:26-28; 9:1,6-7; Ex. 20:11; Psa. 8:6-8; 33:6; Col. 1:16). As the God-ordained leader, provider, and protector of his family, Adam was entrusted with the duty-bound mission of the irreplaceable nature of manhood. Robert Lewis defines “A real man” as “one who rejects passivity, accepts responsibility, leads courageously, and expects the greater reward…God’s reward.”2 In contrast to Adam, who failed to defend the integrity of God’s character, the veracity of His Word, and, as the proverbial knight-in-shining-armor, to rescue the damsel in distress from the fire-breathing dragon, as it were, biblical manhood is not aloof with indifference but rejects passivity, accepts responsibility, and leads courageously (Gen. 2:15; 3:6-10; Neh. 4:14; 1 Cor. 16:13-14).
Cultivate Biblical Manhood. There is a war against traditional masculinity and especially biblical manhood that is producing a massive crisis in American culture, which includes the church and family. The good news is that God’s Spirit is beckoning to the hearts of men, young and old, to be a catalyst towards positive change beginning on the grassroots level right at home. Biblical manhood can be intentionally cultivated through the spiritual disciplines of systematic Bible reading, prayer journaling, and Scripture memorization, along with active engagement with a robust local church community. In pursuit of this kind of spiritual muscle, remember how a wise man once said that “the difference in our lives a year from now will be due to four things: 1. the places we go, 2. the people we meet, 3. the books we read, and 4. the challenges we face” (Pro.27:17; 1 Tim. 3:15; 4:7,13; Titus 2:11-14).
Advancing the Cause of Christ through…The Irreplaceable Nature of Marriage
“And He answered and said to them, ‘Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore God has joined together, let not man separate” (Mat. 19:4-6 NKJV).
The Lord Jesus Christ, in His earthly ministry to the nation of Israel, affirmed the historicity and authority of Genesis by quoting from each of the first two chapters in virtually the same breath, thus upholding the irreplaceable nature of marriage (Gen. 1:27; 2:24; Rom. 15:8). Despite what the sexually perverse spirit of the age that is hell-bent on rebellion against Almighty God asserts, biblical marriage upholds God’s nuclear design, gender roles, and the glory of motherhood (Rom. 1:18-32; Eph. 5:21-33; Titus 2:3-5). A married dad and mom and kids is the gold standard or bull’s-eye of the target designed by God as the natural or nuclear family and is not some type of so-called Western cultural construct. Whereas the extended family is still a blessed part of God’s purpose for the home, He began in the very beginning with a biological man and a biological woman whose marriage relationship establishes the household as central to advancing the cause of Christ to the ends of the earth.
This biological reality is also upheld by God’s design for gender roles within marriage, based on creation order, to reflect the triune nature of the Godhead and Christ’s headship of the Church, which is His Body, that submits to His perfect and sacrificial leadership (1 Cor. 11:3; Eph. 5:22-25; 1 Tim.2:13). Perhaps the most controversial truth of the irreplaceable nature of marriage is that God’s biblical design upholds the glory of motherhood. Radical feminism and the Marxist agenda of woke paganism are in rebellion against the beauty, nobility, and glory of being a wife and mother, which the Holy Scriptures affirm with the utmost honor and dignity in the sight of God (Psa. 128:3; Pro. 31:10-31; 1 Tim.2:15; 2 Tim.1:5; 3:15; Titus 2:3-5).
Regardless of what the sirens of the age assert, only biological women have children, and God’s Word lauds the blessedness of the fruitful womb (Psa. 127:3-5; 139:13; Mal. 2:15). The irreplaceable nature of marriage builds civilization, fills this world with image-bearing worshippers of the one true and living God, and advances the cause of Christ to the ends of the earth beginning right at home.
Cultivate Biblical Marriage. God’s design for marriage is fueled by a sacrificial, sanctifying, and cherishing love from the husband’s heart at the helm of the household and demonstrated in practical reality day by day for the glory of the Sovereign Architect and Omnipotent Powerhouse of biblical family life. Be intentional at cultivating the virtues of love and respect by communicating with your spouse in ways that speak the language of their heart in practical reality (1 Cor. 13:4-7; Eph. 5:33). In other words, demonstrate love through what Gary Chapman describes as the five languages of love: 1. Physical Touch and Closeness, 2. Words of Encouragement, 3. Acts of Service, 4. Gift Giving, and 5. Quality Time.3
Advancing the Cause of Christ through…The Irreplaceable Nature of Fatherhood
“As you know how we exhorted, and comforted, and charged every one of you, as a father does his own children, that you would walk worthy of God who calles you into His own kingdom and glory” (1 Thes. 2:11-12 NKJV).
The Lord God Himself is the perfect Father and epitome of fatherhood whose holiness, righteousness, and justice, along with His merciful lovingkindness and super-abounding grace, renders who He is and all that He has done in and through the person and finished work of the Lord Jesus Christ worthy of all praise. Having been branded in the image of this perfect Father, His Spirit beckons all men to be champions of biblical fatherhood that invests wisdom, instills vision, and infuses courage into the hearts of their children to the praise of His glory in Christ Jesus (Gen. 18:19; 2 Chron. 32:7-8; Neh. 4:14; Eph. 6:4).
Every dad is impacting the next generation whether he realizes it or not because our lives automatically affect our progeny whether or not we are living godly in Christ Jesus. Dads must take heed to themselves before God as the divinely ordained counselors of wisdom, communicators of vision, and cultivators of courage in the hearts and minds of their children (2 Cor. 5:9-10; 1 Thes. 2:11-12).
Cultivate Biblical Fatherhood. Make time for what’s important by carving it out in this season of life before it’s too late by making the following daily and weekly rhythms of life a priority: 1. Family Suppertime, 2. Family Worship, and 3. Family Church Attendance. Gathering around the family table for a meal is one of the most significant disciplines of life that fathers ought to deliberately prioritize on a regular basis for the sake of advancing the cause of Christ right at home (Deut. 6:6-7; Ps. 128:1-3).
In tandem with this old-fashioned habit is what the saints of old called Family Worship or the Family Altar, where fathers would lead their families spiritually through Bible reading, singing hymns of God’s praise, and praying together. Any given Sunday is a celebration of the resurrection of the Lord Jesus Christ and should, therefore, find fathers leading the way as their families gather to attend church with other families to worship the Lord in song, hear the preaching of His Word, and fellowship with the saints at their local assembly (Mat. 28:1; 1 Cor. 16:2; Col. 3:16; 1 Tim. 3:15; Heb. 10:24-25).
Advancing the Cause of Christ through…The Irreplaceable Nature of a Multiplied Legacy
“Telling to the generation to come the praises of the Lord, and His strength and His wonderful works that He has done. That the generation to come might know them, the children who would be born, that they may arise and declare them to their children, that they may set their hope in God…” (Ps.78:4b, 6-7a NKJV).
Advancing the cause of Christ to the ends of the earth through biblical family life from generation to generation is a vision for gospel ministry that must be championed because every one of us are heirs to the past and ancestors to the future. This kind of biblical legacy champions the blessing of children, godly character, and generational faithfulness to the gospel purposes of the Lord Jesus Christ. While the spirit of this age vaunts itself in the abortion holocaust, Almighty God is the Author and Progenitor of life as every precious life is priceless in beauty (Ps. 139:13-16; Jn. 8:44; 10:10).
It’s one thing to have children but quite another thing to intentionally shepherd their hearts in the pathway of wisdom, righteousness, and godliness. The biblical goal of education is moral and spiritual development in the fear of God having awe and reverence for who He is as Creator and Redeemer, along with a wholehearted devotion to His Word (Ps.1:1-6; Pr.1:7; 9:10; Eph.6:4).
Other aspects of childhood experience have a place, but such things like academics, athletics, and social status threaten to subvert the biblical goal of education in the humanistic pursuit of admission to an Ivy League university, earning an NCAA Division I scholarship, or garnering the status of a social media celebrity. Biblical legacy also champions generational faithfulness to the Lord Jesus Christ and the Word of God.
Famously, the 18th-century pastor and theologian Jonathan Edwards was instrumental in the First Great Awakening in the colonial era, but his greatest legacy was the spiritual impact of his family life upon future generations. Be the kind of hero that your progeny in future generations can be grateful for because the testimony of your life points to the irreplaceable nature of a multiplied legacy to the praise of God’s glory in Christ Jesus (Ps.78:1-8; 145:1-4; 2 Tim. 2:2).
Cultivate a Multiplied Legacy. Pray for your children and grandchildren to be blessed with wisdom, vision, and courage. Wisdom to understand the times in which we live through the lens of a comprehensive biblical worldview, spiritual vision to see beyond what is to what could be as far as their lives and ministry are concerned, and courage to initiate decisive action for the cause of Christ (1 Chron. 12:32; 2 Chron. 32:7-8; Eph. 3:20-21; 5:15-17). Also, pray for your children and grandchildren’s future spouses and the families in which they are being raised. Ask the Lord to bring them together in His perfect timing and use them to raise up a godly generation that fears, honors, and serves the King of kings and Lord of lords, the Lord Jesus Christ (Psa. 78:6-8; Pro. 22:6; 31:10; 1 Tim. 1:17).
Finally, pray for your children and grandchildren to gladly receive the blessing of children themselves as a result of their hearts being filled with a passion for advancing the cause of Christ to the ends of the earth beginning right at home through biblical marriage and family life (Gen. 1:28; 9:1, 7; Psa. 127:3-5; Pro. 24:3-4).
The Gathering Storm Over the Generations
In the same spirit as Wolgemuth’s encouragement for biblical family life to mean something radically countercultural, whether it was in the ancient Roman empire or this present evil age, Al Mohler issues another bold challenge for the church and family because of the gathering storm coming over the generations to the secularization of the culture.4 It is looming on the horizon, and intentional ministry training must be co-championed by the church and family in three powerful ways: 1. Christian parents [and grandparents] must view church as the highest and utmost priority for their family’s weekly schedule; 2. Christian parents [and grandparents] need to be serious about the effects of technology, screen time, and social media, and 3. Christian parents [and grandparents] must endeavor to fill their homes with the fragrance of the gospel. Advancing the cause of Christ to the ends of the earth through biblical family life is the stewardship responsibility of our generation. Come what may, let us be faithful to the praise of God’s glory in Christ Jesus!
- Drehr, R. (2020) Live not by lies: a manual for Christian dissidents. New York, NY: Sentinel.
- Lewis, R. (1997) Raising a modern-day knight. Colorado Springs, CO: Focus on the Family Publishing.
- Chapman, G. (1995) The five love languages. Chicago, IL: Northfield Publishing.
- Mohler, Jr., R. Albert. (2020) The gathering storm: secularism, culture, and the church. Nashville, TN: Nelson Books.
*Featured in the June 2023 issue of The Berean Searchlight.
